Life in Brazil

cleaning day.......

Last week Menezes and I took one good look around the classroom in Vila Esperança and decided it was high time we gave it the cleaning it deserved.  So we roped in the help of our students and had cleaning day this morning......followed by snacks afterward.

I picked up some supplies for the classroom at the end of last week.....now they have everything needed to keep the room spic and span.

We were greeted by a new friend who was hanging around outside the classroom and just decided to come in and make himself at home.  He was very friendly......and I so wanted to take him home with me because I love cats.  Unfortunately I don't think I can have a pet in my apartment.....but.....fortunately one of the students took him home with her so he gets a new home.......yay!!

Here they are.....hard at work......the great thing about these kids.....they are not afraid to roll up their sleeves and do some work.....such a refreshing attitude.  Also, this way they are taking ownership of their classroom by keeping it clean.

 

 

......and as always we discover new innovative ways to do cleaning.....as in this case....new ways to clean the floor.

Finally before I sign off....I'd like to share a little something I've been keeping to myself for about 2 months.  Some time back I received a message on Facebook from a man at my church.  He and his wife are very active in missions and well......they had been in conversation with my folks.  They were unaware of what was going on with my mom.  You can read about it here  Anyway the gentleman basically told my folks that it was time they visited me in Brazil and that he and his wife were going to spearhead the effort to make it happen.  So needless to say they have put this endeavor before the church in Yakima to raise funds to send my parents here to visit me.  I am beyond excited....to say the least.  Honestly after my mother's diagnosis I basically came to a place where I thought it just wasn't going to happen given my parent's situation......but God obviously has other ideas.  Isn't it amazing when God steps into the middle of difficult situations and does something so wonderful?

Really.....it's been that long since I posted anything??

I just looked at the date on my last post.....

February 26......sheeeesh.

Really.....it's been that long since I posted anything?  Oh boy.  I guess I've been going through a too tired, too busy and too uninspired to write a blog post phase.....and I hope it passes soon.

You would think that because last year I took two on-line blogging workshops that I would be a pro at this by now and have all kinds of ideas just waiting to make their debut in a blog post.....unfortunately that hasn't been the case.  I must admit it's been hard being motivated to write here and I know I need to find a way back to being motivated because there has been so much going on.  However when tiredness and lack of motivation get together......watch out......because it's a combination which is difficult to overcome.

Anyway.....I thought I would share what's been going on as of late and I'm particularly excited to share a few changes with the ministry in Ilha Bela and Vila Esperança.  Last year I noticed how the kids weren't really paying attention to the weekly Bible stories so I decided to switch things up and now I do brief discussions based on topics.  Thus far we have talked about cheating, friends, encouragement, respect, forgiveness and trust.  It's been really good and I usually get good interaction with the students and......some have really been listening so I'm greatly encouraged by all of this.  I conclude each "discussion" with our weekly memory verse which coincides with the week's topic.  Please be in prayer for these kids because I can see God is moving.  Secondly, due to the selling of my car I've been without wheels for little over a month so Menezes graciously comes and picks me up for the classes.  This means I've been getting up an hour earlier on Tuesdays and Wednesdays to be out to the classes by 8 am and then I return with him in the afternoons to be there by 2.  Granted being without a car can be a bit of a pain but in this situation it has provided me the opportunity to spend more time with each of the classes.  Instead of only being with each group for an hour I've been spending two hours with them.  I've been enjoying it so much that even when we are able to get another car for me I plan to continue spending two hours with each group.  We have only been in session for about 7 weeks and as I said I can see God moving.  I'm already looking at next year and the possibility of doing a reward retreat in July.......it will take a lot of planning and preparing....but I can see it is very doable.

Then there is the English school and my three which is to soon become four private students.  It has been a blessing to be able to help these people improve a skill that is very important to them and at the same time have "discussions" with them from time to time.  It is amazing to me how many times opportunities are given to us to "engage" others in a way where some seeds can be planted.  I'm enjoying these classes as well as the ones with the kids and I find it very interesting that in this particular season of time God would bring me back to be so heavily involved in English once again.  It makes me wonder what He's up to and just where all of this will lead.

I must say even though we are only in the fourth month of 2012 this year I find myself involved in more things than I ever have been here in Brazil and if all of these things were not enough I'm also working on a "special project" in my spare time....which many times I have to specifically arrange for in order to get anything done on it.  I'm not going to come out with what it is but as it develops and takes shape I will definitely share more about it.....so I ask please be in prayer because I have never ever taken on anything like this before and I know without a doubt it is something God is leading me to do.

Well there you have it......and I promise not to wait another month and half before I post again......just need to get motivated and put some ideas down on paper.

....a story I've been sitting on for too long.

It's been a month and a half that I've been sitting silent here on my blog and now it's time to break the silence.  First I just want to say "thank-you" to those of you who have been praying for me and my family regarding the situation with my Mom.  Having all of this dropped on me right before my vacation....flying home and only having three weeks to try and start processing what this is going to mean for all of us and then returning here only to find the enemy waiting to bombard me with a bunch of emotional/spiritual stuff to deal with.....not fun times.  Yet as I said before.......Jesus is with me.....in everything.

Anyway......I have something I wanted to post almost two weeks ago and it's just been sitting on the shelf sort of speak and it's time to actually write about it.

I returned out to Ilha Bela and Vila Esperança the second week of February.  I decided that during this month I would put together games and activities and then we would get started with another book at the beginning of March.  Anyway I figured since it had been almost two full months since I had seen the kids they would probably ask about my vacation.

My vacation.....what would I say?  Would I pretend that everything was fine and omit the fact that it was not only a beautiful time with family but also extremely difficult?  Or....would I be completely open and tell them everything?  I believe there are times when it is best to keep silent about some things and then there are the moments when we need to open up.

I decided ahead of time that if they asked I wouldn't hold anything back.

I've talked about this situation enough times now that I don't get emotional yet I have to say something significant took place with the afternoon class in Ilha Bela.  This class had some new students and I could see they were excited to be there and be apart of the class.  Then the question came......and I started explaining....except this time I started getting emotional.....something I did not want to do and I told them as such.  I could see from the looks on their faces especially the older ones that they understood the seriousness of the situation.  Then it happened......one of the new students who happens to be named Emily (same name as my youngest niece) asked a question.

"Didn't you become depressed because of what is happening with your Mom?"

Isn't it interesting how God shows up in the most unexpected places and puts an opportunity right in front of us?

My response:  "Sure, I became sad when I found out....but a person who is depressed is a person who has no hope.  I have God and He is with me in this situation.  I have God therefore, I have hope."

What followed was a moment  in which I could sense something spiritually significant was taking place as those kids were taking in my words......and my faith in God.

Terrible things happen and because we live in this present world there isn't a single one of us who is immune to tragedy.  The question is what will be our response in the face of tragedy?  Our response will reveal what we truly believe about God.

And the world is watching.

something i found on pinterest.........

Source: 30.media.tumblr.com via Shelly on Pinterest

 

here is the world.....beautiful and terrible things will happen.....don't be afraid.

I wish I could take credit for coming up with that title myself but it's a quote by Frederick Buechner which was featured in an article called "Creativity Heals" from the January/February 2012 issue of Creating Keepsakes magazine.

I was perusing the magazine when this particular quote just seemed to jump out at me and it seemed to sum up everything which had transpired from the last few days before my vacation right up to that present moment.

You see....my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's the first week of December and she called me the day before I was to leave to go to the States for my Christmas vacation.

She didn't want to call.....yet my father insisted....because he didn't want to ambush me with this news upon getting off a plane after a 24 hour journey.

This is the news no one wants to receive......this is the kind of thing which "happens to other people."  Yet I was thankful she called because I needed to know what I was going home to......and yet at the same time I really didn't know what I was going home to......until I got there.

I'm not going to get into details.....but needless to say....behind the scenes I cried.....I got angry....and in front of everyone else I tried to "be strong".  I thought I could handle my emotions.......by either running away from or stuffing them.

Oh but Jesus is just too smart for all that......and after being home for one week I began to notice an underlying current of irritation just below the surface.....which was not behaving itself......but was fighting to get out.

So while my Christmas was one of the most beautiful and one of the most difficult I've ever experienced.....there........just under the surface.......the irritation continued.

I couldn't put my finger on it.....I found myself troubled by it and yet each time it tried to break free...it would be stuffed back into place leaving me all the more perplexed by it.

that is.....until yesterday.

Yesterday.......it broke out in all it's ugliness.....and I found myself pacing in my apartment....and in my mind I was saying...."Jesus....I can't do this......Jesus.....I can't do this.....Jesus....I can't do this....." tears free flowing.

and there it was........I can't do this....not in my strength......but Jesus can.

How many times do we fool ourselves or the enemy of our souls deceives us into thinking we can handle the tragedies of this life in our own strength??

How many times do I have to remember that Jesus is right there on the other side of the door with everything I need while I'm half-way across the room getting ready to open the kitchen cabinet to get my hands on what I think will help me cope with my inconsolable heart??

I can't handle the ramifications of what it means for my mother having Alzeimer's........yet Jesus can......

and right now in this present moment....that's all I need to know.

it's been a busy week.........

but it's been good........very good.

Last weekend we had our favela Christmas party with around 50 students in attendance.  Despite the rainy weather the kids had a good time playing group games, visiting, eating and some even won a few prizes.  Here take a look.....

Next up.....the reward store....

...and here we are in Ilha Bela ready for business.....

decisions.....

 

decisions........

 

decisions.......

 

Vila Esperança store.....open....and ready for customers....

 

Help.....I can't make a decision.....I want everything.....

 

I am so proud of this girl......Gabi is one of our new students and is doing so well that she puts some of our older students to shame.  Her mother has started attending our church...please be in prayer for them.

The reward store in a word was a......success.  Everyone enjoyed and when I asked the students if they liked it everyone resounded with an enthusiastic "YES!!"   Some even went as far as to say they loved it.  It was neat to watch the students spend their points not just on themselves but also on gifts for their siblings or parents. 

 This was my first year having the whole of responsibility for this ministry and I have felt it.  It has not been easy doing this alone...yet it has been a very positive year.  Menezes and I have been talking during these past few months and we are both of the consensus that we want to change and reform some aspects of the classes.  This is not to say that what we are doing is broken....it's just that after some observation I would like to improve upon what is currently being done.  I would ask for your continued prayers for this ministry as we consider the direction God would like us to take us.  Also I would like to say that without you what we have been doing simply would not be realized...so from all of us here in Brazil......

 

Thank you.....

 

Thank you.....

 

Thank you....

....and Thank you!!

this just makes me smile......

I was informed by my brother that the first Christmas gift under the tree at their house is for me.....from my neice Abby.  I love you too Abby and Emily....can't wait to see  you next week!!

Recovering from the weekend......Christmas party for my students in Ilha Bela and Vila Esperança....was a huge success.  I'll be posting some pics soon.  I spent this morning dividing the prizes for tomorrow and Wednesday's "reward" store.  Wasn't quite the same without Dave and Carol this time....but it's coming together.  Promise to post pics from all the events this week.

 

Do you still have a blog????

Well.......yes I do.......despite the fact that it's been almost 2 months since my last post.

Honestly there are various reasons for the long lapse which I will not get into at this moment...but needless to say it's been a combination of internal battles and the business of life.  My desire is to write more in depth about the struggles....battles....and victories as of late.....but for now some photos will just have to suffice.

Our Thanksgiving spread......Brakefield's and I spent the holiday together

Look at my four beautiful apple pies.....for Life English Center's special Thanksgiving event

Students and their parents came and were treated to an American Thanksgiving meal and program

Everyone enjoyed the food and fellowship

The students sang "Give Thanks" as part of the program

 

Next up........the craziness of getting ready for the Christmas Party for my students in Ilha Bela and Vila Esperança and the "reward store" for next week.

the problem of pain......

  

the problem of pain is......

Wait a minute isn't that the title of a book by C.S. Lewis?  While I haven't actually read The Problem of Pain it is definitely a volume I want to get my hands on so as to get some insight into what Lewis has to say on the subject.

Me?  Well I can't promise anything as remotely profound as Lewis what I can share is some of what God has been dealing with me about as of late.

Which in some part will explain my prolonged absence and silence on the web.  God and I have been battling through some difficult heart issues which have been buried underneath layers and layers of self comfort, self-protection, hiding and running.  Ah....there is nothing like being in a spiritual desert to expose the depths of what lurks in the recesses of the human heart and there is nothing like a loving God who won't leave well enough alone.

The problem of pain is.........we find ourselves in a world where pain is an everyday occurrence and we were never designed to have to live with this reality.  That my friends....is difficult for me to swallow....for I have had to live with more than my fair share of pain.  I know what it to be bullied, humiliated, mocked, rejected, lonely, used, abused and taken advantage of.  There isn't a single human being who doesn't know what it is to experience pain.  The question is.......what does one do with it?

The question of  the hour....what do I do with my pain?  I wish I could say I've always know the right way of handling my heart in regard to this....but as God has revealed I haven't.  You see after peeling back layer after layer I have come to realize that I believed the lies that I could actually manage my pain.....that I could hide from it.......run away from it. 

The truth of the matter is this:

I have said these things to you, that in Me you may have peace.  In the world  you will have tribulation.  But take heart; I have overcome the world.  - John 16:33

and....

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin.   Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.  - Hebrews 4:15-16

Jesus knows what is to be clothed in human skin......He knows what it is to experience pain....He also knows what it is to be faced with the world's comentary(Satan's lies) on what to do with ones pain.  The world (Satan) would tell  you pain can be stuffed, numbed, escaped, and hidden from and you can pick what ever method works for you.  Yet Jesus says....."in this world you will have tribulation"....period.  We will experience pain.....and there is no escaping it......but what are we to do when we are faced with it....and it feels so overwhelming and the suffering so excruciating?  Jesus knows we are constantly faced with the temptations to "mishandle" our hearts....and he sympathizes with that temptation.  He, himself faced the very same temptations.....yet did not give in.  He says to us in those excruciating moments.....

 "Come here......and let Me give you what you truly need."

I know this because He has been saying this to me.  He has exposed my ways of trying to handle my pain.....to which He has revealed is a form of idolatry....because I dared to believe that I could deal with this reality of pain in my own strength........independent from Him.

Ours was never intended to be an independent existence.....and anyone who would dare suggest that it was is a liar.

So as we enter into a new week......may I ask how are you really and are you allowing Jesus to be the High Priest of your soul?

 

it's Wednesday......

 

and it's a holiday here in Brazil......actually it's their Independence Day....so I have a free day to do what I like...which is nice.

It's especially nice since as of yet I don't have internet at the apartment and not sure when I will as it turns out that the one internet provider is not so great with customer service.  Aaron Brakefield spent 25 minutes on the phone yesterday with them trying to secure the order to have it installed and was just about complete when he was cut off.  Needless to say by that point after numerous attempts he was a bit frustrated so back to the drawing board.

Cable...however...shall be installed in about 3 days and if I don't say so myself I did pretty good with conversing with the service representative who called to confirm the order yesterday afternoon...even though I hate talking on the phone because it is still quite difficult to understand people...I do much better with a "live" person.

So I'm here at the mission house surfing the web...at my leisure...which doesn't happen very often and I thought I'd post a few pics from the move.  I've been waiting for the moving company to come and pick up their moving crates which now 3 weeks later are still in 3 stacks in my apartment.  Yet I began thinking that I promised a post with some pics so I better do it.  So here a few and I'll do another one with more....after the crates have been promptly removed.

 
Outside my apartment building...I live on the first floor

 
My living room

 
One side of my kitchen/laundry combo

 
and the other....where do I dry my clothes, you ask.....that will be answered in another post

 
My bedroom

 

Well that's it for now.....I'll give a proper tour once the crates are gone....which I hope is soon.

Hope you are enjoying your day...where ever you are.